It sounds like you were put in a tough situation that you're not used to being in. I think anyone could have felt overwhelmed. Of course, when we think about wanting to avoid something, there's a chance alcohol is going to come to mind.
You're not doing anything wrong at all. Maybe you just need a little extra support right now in your new position.... (like another person from management there to take some of the heat, or even just someone on your level to talk to).....
Give yourself a hug, OK - you're doing great!
