Hi Hermetic,
Thank you for sharing and being SO honest. I really, really feel your pain. I felt as though you were sharing the story I lived a few months ago!
I have a boyfriend who is much older than myself. I knew he was an alcoholic about two weeks into our relationship when I learned about his two previous times in rehab and previous DUI's. It was a HORRIBLE relationship from the start, I can say that now looking back but at the time it felt great! He was dotting, made me feel great, fun etc etc. Within three months I was paying all the expenses, he was not working, I was driving him and his kids everywhere as he didnt have a license, I was basically raising the kids on his weekends b/c he just wasn't there mentally, emotionally, and sometimes physically he just could not care for them. Stupidly, I moved in with him and took on a lease (still paying for everything). After about three months of living together I stepped back and looked at my life: I had gone from a self supporting, straight A student with a bright future to a college drop out, stripper, anxious and depressed individual totally dependent on a man who was doing NOTHING to benefit me. Even in that dark realization I somehow was able to see the 'light at the end of the tunnel'. I thought about what I had been before...I was GREAT before I let all this happen and I decided I needed to get back to that place, even better, no matter what. So, I left him. It was HARD...really, really hard. BUT it has been about five months since I made that decision and I have never once regretted it. I thank myself every day. AND HE thanks me for what I did pretty consistently too. He drank himself into the hospital a few weeks after I left, he called me horrible things, did horrible things to me and my family and eventually...he decided to get sober. He is sober now, going on four months. I am not responsible for him, he is.
I am getting emotional just thinking about all this...best decision I EVER made.
I wish you luck! I know that if I made it out and improved my situation you can too!