I can definitely relate to how you feel - my husband gets loud and overpowers me also. I found it was always best to talk to him the morning after. He is usually apologetic and tells me that we are going to be okay that it wont happen again and I wont have to worry ever again. Now he just sneaks behind my back and lies to me when I ask.
I have learned a lot on this forum and I am now in Alanon. I know not to even ask him, I am trying to just work on myself - but I still question it to make sure it isnt just me being crazy!
You have found a forum with a lot of great people to help clear your mind and they give great advice!