I used to love getting drunk and watching ufc. It's a big change watching it sober. I also have a hard time dealing with other people being drunk around me. I can't stand the smell, the behavior, the noise. I know tonight will be a challenge but it's something I need to do. I think I have to start getting used to the fact that that I don't drink anymore but that doesn't mean the people around me are always going to be sober.
I think about drinking and remember what fun I had and how relapse Is normal in recovery and I almost allow myself to think it's okay to have that one drink. Alcohol plays so many tricks on me even when I don't drink it anymore. I guess that demon will always be lurking in the back ground wanting to make a come back. I have all these mixed feelings about tonight. I should stay home but I'm tired of isolating myself.so tonight I am going out to watch the fights and I am not going to drink any alcohol and I'm going to have fun. Time to break the cycle
