I think I would look at myself, and my behaviors. What compelled me to go over there to be with him?
That he was a smooth talker sometimes, and gave you attention, and then other times withheld the type of attention you wanted...how come, for so long, you desired this relationship?
The thing is to nail our own needy and unhealthy behaviors...offering "almost anything"
sounds to me like you made a trade...willingly and knowingly....it was an agreement between the two of you and somewhere along the line the deal was deemed no longer fair or maybe no longer beneficial...we can willingly make a deal with the devil sometimes you know...we have to turn the attention back to critiquing our own behavior, and focusing less on theirs is the way to do it.
So if you put aside that he was a smooth talker, and examine YOU as you were driving over there, what were you chasing and was it healthy? A question for yourself to answer, privately to yourself if you want.