Ugh...that is SUCH a crappy feeling to find proof of them using.
The first thing I found with my husband was when I went to do his laundry and emptied the pockets of his jeans and out came this little box of Police Mints or something like that that he got on Amazon...
They were to cover up your breath in case you were drinking.
I was LIVID!
I poured them out all over his laptop so he would see them when he woke up and I left some snarky note with them and left the apartment.
When I came back they were cleaned up and in the garbage.
We talked about it and he made up some excuse about them helping his sinus condition and him liking the flavor of them.
SO LAME!
I was like, well get some other friggin' mints for your sinuses and your taste buds, all right? If your'e not using them to hide that you've been drinking then why get them at all!?
I was in denial and this point -- angry as all get out, but didn't get it that he was in an addictive pattern at this point. We were only married a couple of months maybe at this point -- and I just thought he was being stupid, but really it was him in his sickness I have come to find out.
So sorry you're being lied to. I know it can be maddening.
Through reading and talking with others I've come to see that my snooping around in his stuff now is a way that I stay codependent. Counting my pills to see if he's taken any, and all that crap. It's all in an effort to try to control him and it's just going to keep making me sicker as long as I keep engaging in that behavior.
So thats' why I'm in my own recovery right now with Al Anon...and thank God for that!
Really looking forward to going to my meeting tonight. There are two al anon meetings that I really like the people at so far and this is one of them.
How about you...do you have a support group locally you can visit?
Great that you're back at the forums now. I just joined this weekend and I'm super grateful.