I'm sure you already know this but just be careful---alcoholics tend to use things like extreme reactions (even if they are genuine) and unsafe behavior to also keep people from leaving them or changing. I know this because not only did my BF do it, I did it too.
Also, it's really, really hard to get yourself better and watch out for someone else too, especially if that person doesn't want to stop drinking themselves. Try to maintain that balance but don't get discouraged or upset if you can't---it's very difficult.
There's also several posts on here (one just recently; today I think) about how trying to recover, help another recover or moderate, and stay in the relationship sometimes ends up with the person who is trying to recover drinking again just to deal with it or feel like the relationship is "normal" again.
Again, I am not expert but I have tried to stop several times with partners who were alcoholics and it was a tough slog. I ended up drinking again.
So just be easy on yourself and take care of you first. Also check around some of the other threads and forums and I think you'll see a lot of similar situations there and useful advice. I definitely did.
Best of luck to you and keep us updated!!
Originally Posted by
mistlechild 
Thanks, Ptcapote. I can see that he doesn't like this mirror being held up either and it's painful to see him struggling. I'm trying to focus on myself, but he's in contact and I don't want to cut it off because I worry about his safety. When he gets really upset, he tends to overreact. Still, I know that I have to work on myself first and foremost. It's a weird balance--trying to maintain my own sanity while trying to give him some perspective, too. I love him and worry that if he doesn't get help he'll be too far gone. He has one friend who really sticks by him when the going gets tough. He was the only one on his side who reached out to me to ask my opinion. Unfortunately, he tends to surround himself with yes-men, though. "Yes, she's overreacting." "Yes, you should have a drink."
I'm going to keep posting because it's helping me. You guys are amazing. Thank you.