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Old 03-02-2013, 05:21 AM
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tomsteve
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
another one passed away.

his name was joe, he was an alcoholic. joe is the one i mention on here about who at one time lived in a doorway in the cass corridor of detroit. joe was one who nearly lost all. his wife and family wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.
joe took his drinking to the point where physical damage was done. cirrhosis had set in. then in 1981 a miracle started happening. he ended up in the hospital near death. cirrhosis set in. he was very bad shape.
then he had a visit from some friends of Bill W. what they said didnt make no sense as the alcohol had his brain pretty fogged up. even though none of it made sense, one little thing did sink into is brain: hope.
joe gained as much of his physical health back as was possible.he went to meetings, got a sponsor, got the big book, got a higher power, and did what the big book and his sponsor suggested. hope never left.
i didnt meet joe until about 3 years ago( i didnt know he had been sober all that time). i coudnt stand him when he started showin up at meetings. he was too dam calm, always serious,and always stressing hope and a higher power. joe would come up to me after meetings(now, at meetings, joe would be doodling on his coffeee cup and i thought he wasnt listening to anything that was being said), and say,"tom, i listened to what ya were sayin, but i dont know where the big book tells us to do that.can ya point it out to me?"
"pick up the dam book and read it!" i would say.he did this quite often to me, not with a holier than thou attitude and just wanting to help another alcoholic.
welp, it didnt take long, but i saw that I was the one who needed to pick up the book and read it!
one day at a meeting, when it was joes turn to spreak, he mentioned his granddaughter had been hit by a drunk driver and nearly killed, then got onto the topic at hand. i thought that was weird.
about a year later, at a meeting, when it was joes turn, he shared that his wife of 41 years had passed away, then got right onto topic. i was stunned!! so i grabbed HIM after the meeting."joe, i when your granddaughter was almost kiled, ya didnt say anything more that that and got on topic. now here you are. yuor wife of 41 years passed away and ya did it again. how come ya dont talk about it at meetings?"
"tom, ya know i was livin in detroit when i got sober,right? i didnt have a choice over a sponsor. i was given one. the way it was back then was take your problems to your sponsor and the solution to the meetings and since i didnt know crap, my sponsor said it was highly advised i keep my mouth shut until knew what im talkin about. when i took my problems to my sponsor, the solution was straight from the big book. its been workin all this time and thats what i still do. i have been through some very very difficult things in life over the years and this is one of them. this is where i must keep my higher power in the driver seat and help another drunk. it got me though everything else and it will get me through this."
i came to enjoy seein joe at meetings( that happened before his wife passed away). i loved the message he carried. when a step was brought up, he would bring up the principle of the step. that made me see i didnt know what the principles of the steps were!!
what i absolutely loved was see the way joe carried the message of a higher power and the message of hope, 2 things he talked about a lot.
unfortunately, some of the physical damage from alcohol is irreversible. the cirrhosis started comin back bad.no, he wasnt drinking. as joe even said, this is one of the consequences of my actions i have had to live with.
joe passed away last week. he had been in a nursing home for 3 weeks. he didnt want any visitors other than his immediate family. he didnt was a memorial. why? that was joe. just from what i know of joe, if i were to go visit him, upon entering the room i could imagine him sayin," isnt there a meeting somewhere with a drunk that coiuld use your help?"
if there was to be a memorial, i could hear joe saying,'cmon, people. im dead! here ya all are and theres drunks out there dieing from this disease! dont ya remeber its cunning,baffling, and powerful!?!? get yer but to a meeting and help another drunk!!"

yup, im missin my friend today, but i am also blessed. i can hear him sayin,"tom, get over it. im dead!! now go carry the message of hope!!"
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