Originally Posted by
AnvilheadII 
turn it around....how would YOU feel if you rec'd "helpful tips" from a former flame? hi, i've been thinking about how messed up you are and here's what i think might help you.
what is your MOTIVE after all this time to still try and FIX this guy?
I don't know for certain but honestly I am an odd duck. I tend to actually listen and take everything into consideration. Oddly, he's the one that taught me that. "When people say something critical of you and it's difficult to hear, you have to listen and think about it. Are they right? If so, fix it. If not, don't worry about it."
I also definitely don't think about him as "messed up" now. I did back then eventually and that's exactly the way I stated it at the time. I would never frame it that way.
My motivation is that it sucks that people suffer and I like to think I could help them all. Because I'm so fabulous and have all the answers, you know?. Also so I don't think about the things that need attention in my own life!
I knew the answer to this already, right? But he called on my birthday (a while ago) and if he calls me again I'm going to tell him what has happened with my family. I never did, it all happened after we split. I usually tell him something to get him off the phone quickly, anyway.
