Yup. I was abused too and it's taken a lifetime to get used to being hugged. I can handle and even initiate it because I know it's expected. But I just hate it. I still cringe inside. My husband has gotten used to me, ha ha. Most would never know if I didn't tell them. What I hate the most is when someone comes up from behind me and hugs me, freak out in a split second I have to go from my beaten/escape mode to "I know it's someone nice, calm down, wait it out." Yeah really hard. Conditioning.