It's poison to everyone, but especially so to those like me. I definitely viewed it in the short term temporarily release aspect. That's all it really was. It was a very short term solution. I would know that after it's consumed I had (x) hours to enjoy it. It actually kind of took more fun out of it, because when I would be tossed I would watch the clock tick away, knowing the tomorrow was inevitably coming and my problems would still be there. I just didn't know what to do other than that. Well, I did, but AA "wasn't going to help!!!" Oh how "hard-headed" I was.
My spiritual learning, in early recovery, I believe is going upwards at a very steep angle like on a graph. I was just thinking that maybe the angle on the graph will lesson over time and kind of level off at a point, but that's a very limiting way to think about it!! Who says there is any end to spiritual learning? Why did I even feel there could be? There's always something to learn, and the more I love and work with others, the more I will be exposed to new spiritual things, thus increasing the curve more and more.