@Laurie6781 - thank you!! That advice hit a chord in me. I am printing it out and posting it where I can see it all the time. You get so caught up in the day to day that it doesn't occur to you there's SUCH A LARGER picture. It will take LONG TERM continuous sobriety for my husband to be able to begin to adapt to living in society as a sober individual. It isn't until he is capable of functioning as a whole person till he will be able to contribute to a partnership. Spot on.