tehmazzyland

I find it difficult to compare the two. For a start I didn't go into a quit-ciggies rehab with support workers and random wee tests, and there wasn't any 'alcohol gum' either (prob'ly a good thing).

It's been a while sober now, and I don't ever think 'Wow I could murder a beer' - if only because I remember how destructive my life was with drinking.

But I stopped smoking for three years, then had six months back on them, then last year stopped again. But the only reason I don't have a smoke now is that it is such a damn ball-ache to quit.

I want a ciggie. Maybe because it's a 'safe' relapse of a kind - won't lose home and mind and family just for a few smokes. I don't want a drink. Drink would kill me, fast. Ciggies would kill me eventually. But quitting ciggies... damn it's just irritating. I hate quitting. So I can't smoke again, only because I can't be bothered having to quit again.

So... er... yeah, ciggies not so immediately and uber-massively break everything evilness... but in a way it makes them tricksier. I really really could MURDER a ciggie, most of the time. Tempted even now to go get a pack of baccy... (won't)... keep thinking I should get gum, but it's the slippery slope. Damn nicotine. Damn you!

/ramble ramble ramble

:|

Yeah. Thanks. Now I really want a ciggie!