Originally Posted by soberlicious

Me too, I was a "smoke it to the filter" kinda girl. Same way I drank, til it was all gone or til couldn't physically lift it to my mouth.

With booze it was life or death...with the butts, I wasn't to that point yet, but I started thinking, "Hey, I wonder if I could use the same strategies I used when I quit drinking..."

I had a pretty serious love affair with benzos too. Also a "process addiction" some would call it.

With all of these it felt the same or similar. I wanted to quit, but didn't want to quit. Wanted to quit, but couldn't. The attempts to moderate were there, each couched differently according to the DOC, but there nonetheless. Upon breaking that cycle, my addictive voice messed with me to get me to engage in each of those addictions the same way. The justifications were there, the perceived triggers...same beast with a slightly different face.