Sherry, have you talked to a therapist? I think that's what I would do, it doesn't make sense why you would chase something that doesn't want to be chased, hurt you and cause you grief. Just because they're family doesn't mean they're good for you.
I personally try to avoid my mom as I am done tolerating her behavior, her denial and her blaming EVERYTHING in her life on everyone else and not accepting that she made choices and that she needs to do the right thing.
Also, you didn't mention if you were drinking or taking drugs over any of this? Do you know that you are on a recovery web site?
Certainly we can relate, we all have our issues. Good luck to you.