invisable
Hi. This is my first post so I'm a little nervous.
I am 59 years old and what I believe to be the "lost child" in my family. What hurts me the most is that I am still being treated this way by my siblings (parents have passed).
There was 8 siblings, 4 boys and 4 girls. Two of them have passed due to cancer.
In my family there is the family favorite, my next oldest sister who is 64. My mother let me know that she hated me and that she and my father never wanted me, while she praised the favored sister. This has caused me much grief and pain throughout my lifetime.
My oldest sister who is 69 shows obvious favortism for the fave while pretty much blowing me off which triggers that old favortism pain from my mom.
Well, we have just found out that the oldest sister has lung cancer. I am devistated. I wanted so badly to be close to her only to be discounted over and over again.
So now, not only am I grieving for her, I am grieving for the sister-relationship that could never be. I feel as if she just threw me away so I'm not only sad, I'm hurt and angry all at the same time.
It feels just like the hurt I experienced with my mother, unfinished business and I don't know how to overcome it.
Please anyone, I would appreciate your input and support for I feel so alone with this. Sorry so long
Thanks and God bless, Sherry