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Oh boy. So my RABF has been sober for about a year and a half. He does not really feel temptation if he is at dinner with friends and they are having a drink. He has removed himself from the bar/lounge scene but is thinking that he might be ready to go out to these places once in a while for a special occasion.

After being a part of SR and other support groups, I have realized that he needs to make these decisions on his own so I have kept quiet. He himself has realized how boring it would be for him to go to a bar for a friends birthday and has stayed away. But he has also expressed that he feels left out since his friends mainly are always in a heavily alcohol-focused venue or activity. His friends would never pressure him to drink and know he stopped but he has never told them why or the severity of his drinking problem.

Recently he told me his friend is having a bachelor party in Costa Rica in May. When he brought it up my only reaction was to make fun of how rich his friends are and how poor I am...I was TOTALLY biting my tongue. I asked if he was thinking about going and his response was "I probably shouldn't right?" but all I said is that he should get all the information and then make a decision.

Would him going on this week-long trip for a bachelor party be even remotely appropriate? I mean in my head he is going from limited to no alcohol exposure to TOTAL exposure. The reason I am turning to my SR friends is because sometimes I see things only from my side and want to make sure that I am not doing so this time. Regardless of what he decides, I just want to know if there is some reasoning that I could be missing that would make it okay for him to be in that environment.

I would love some opinions.