I guess I'm not done. If I had known this was a possibility, I would have addressed his childhood differently. I would have focused on different things - I had NO IDEA this was a possible outcome. He showed no traits as a child of any behavioral problems that would make me think this could happen.
He is extremely sensitive . . .I didn't even know he was drinking in high school - or just assumed it was regular kid stuff . . .
I gave him all kinds of resources on ACOA - he wasn't interested.
I gave him all kinds of books on spiritual subjects and tried to nurture that part of him.
I thought his nastiness and moodiness were regular teenage angst that he would grow out of - but I addressed bad behavior every time.
But if I had known this was a possibility I would have done things differently - not sure exactly what but I would have done something - anything to get him the help that he apparently needed. (He did see a therapist once and the therapist told him he didn't need therapy.)
Could-a Should-a Would-a.
I feel like a big idiot and everything I did was wasted.