Committed to Change.
So today is day 2 and I cant beileve im trying to get sober again. This past sunday was a true eye opener for me tho. I had been seeing this guy for a couple of weeks and finally had the perfect date planned on sunday. I was so nervous my addiction of course convinced me to take a couple back before the date. Why did i listen?!? Thru out the date i continued to drink and of course began to make a fool of myself. By time we sat for dinner he was pissed and bascilly told me my behavior was unexceptable.. He was disappointed in me and just wanted to get outta there. He was so right! Altho i heard it from my friends and family for the past eight years i guess hearing it from a complete stranger was what i needed to truly hear it. I keep sitting here beating myself up for messing it up with the guy of my dreams and how disgusted he must be of me..until i had a revelation that this is so not about him. This is a me issue! Maybe just maybe he was sent in my life for that brief moment to show me myself.I NEED TO GAIN CONTROL!! Because head not created to be an embarrassment to anyone.
I guess i wrote this post because if there is anyone who can relate or simply just have a word of encouragement is greatly appreciate that...