Yes there is definitely something in the why. I suspect its something about the denial. My AH or STBXAH used to completely withdraw - no communication at all and when I broke down would act aghast and say But I'm not doing anything to you - I'm just withdrawing. I do have a lot of anger definitely and its tied up with - I don't know - the denial - if I'm not aware then its not really happening. Who knows? Time will tell I guess. But yes it will be instructive when I can answer that question.