I think as we go on, we find ways to deal with our emotions rather than just being a victim to them. With drugs or alcohol we can pretty much instantly change the way we feel even though it doesnt always bring us what we want, we know it will be "different"
In sobriety, we have to develop coping mechanisms. And to do this, its using trial and error.
Some of the things I do to change the way I feel are going for a walk, having a hot bubble bath, chatting on here, chatting to a friend, listening to music, researching a topic I am interested in, having a nap, or simply getting under the duvet and allowing it to "cuddle" me, having something to eat or meditation.
I am no expert but these things do help me and I am sure that the more we practice, the more we will be confident that we dont have to succumb to negative feelings and feel that the only alternative is drugs or drink