Ann...#27
Ann and all!!
On the codependent checklist #27 was brought up and the subject is communication. If Ann had not pointed it out I would have anyway...it has been on my mind the last couple of days and that usually means I need to look at something.
Are you guilty of beating around the bush? Manipulating? A sigh instead of a response? Pouting? Obvious body language? The silent treatment?
The addictive relationship warps our communication skills. We learn to not communicate directly. If we grew up with addiction we probably have been doing this since we were small. A parent feels guilty so tears get us what we want...then many years later we use them on our husband.
If we grew up with abuse the only communication we had available was indirect.
If we have close relationships with dysfunctional people we may have learned to avoid conflict by manipulating.
Being direct does not mean going for the jugular...it means knowing what you want and expressing that calmly...or passionately if need be.
Any thoughts on communication?