Said

I posted a while ago under Said. I too, lived w/ an acoholic pot smoker who just threw me aside like an old rag after 6 years, for another (heroin addict) woman, and they just recently got married. He treated me similarly, blamed me for all his problems, etc. But that is what addicts do, because they are unable to take responsibility on themselves, also, as many people have pointed out, their only real love is their substance, and whoever is around using with them is just a "using buddy", as they are unable to form any real bond, due to the fact that they are bonded with their substance. My ex and his new wife, then, are really only married so they can both have their own relationships with drugs and alcohol. Although I am heartbroken, I know how hard it was to live with someone whose only real love was his substance, and who only "held me hostage" as they say in Al-Anon, to have someone there with him. It has been a long road, and I know that I need to work on myself and my co-dependant issues as well, but also know that they are sick, and that you, in time, can be well, and that you never have to take that kind of treatment from anyone again. It's not just you, they can't be available to anyone. See if you can find the post "What Addicts Do" in the stickies; this opened my eyes to some truths about them. Many hugs.