Hi,
I'm a 99.99999% Atheist leaning Agnostic who's perceptive to occasional Animistic Whisperings. That said, I quit cold turkey almost 2.5 years ago.
Ten years before trying to quit drinking, I had an absolutely horrible experience trying to quit smoking cigarettes. Try as I might, I somehow always found myself close to a store with the money in my pocket, or repeatedly planned ahead how I would fail next.
Then I read about addiction and the physiological reasons for feeling all those confusing emotions, thoughts from nowhere, and unstoppable urges.
I don't know if my interpretation is correct, but it worked for me. What I learned was that deep in the brain, in the Limbic System and lower, my brain had in essence produced a garden of extra Dopamine receptors to greedily consume compounds in the cigarettes which brought short term bliss and happiness to my brain.
When not getting what they want, they use every single evolutionary trick in the book to get that feeling again. Back in the mists of time, well before we became Human, this was a good thing as it gave us those feelings we feel when we fall in love, consume delicious food, or have sex.
Withdrawal is what we experience when those receptors don't get what they need.
Urges and unplanned for decisions that have you standing outside the store with the money in your hand..."It was like I was on autopilot"...are those receptors guiding and manipulating the rest of your conscious, thinking brain into doing exactly opposite of what it knows is harmful to it.
Crazy, or what?
What I learned quitting cigarettes gave me a roadmap of success to beating addiction that I could apply to my drinking way too much alcohol.
I had learned that urges come as bell curves; slowly first, then building in intensity, and gradually fading away. Knowing this you can ride them out, breathing deeply, because you know they'll fade away and also become less frequent with time. They will disappear in time as the garden of receptors shrinks in size and regain their balance, but there are other insidious tricks coming...
Even years later you have to be ready for the quietly sneaky, subversively logical, but most dangerous tricks of all...the intrusive little thoughts which make it seem that it would be a most sensible idea to have just one sip, or just one drink. These are actually very strong...the sort of elemental urges that push birds or whales for thousands of miles of migration.
You must remember, always, that one drink will always equal many, many, many more!
(Do some google searches for articles on the physiological reasons for addiction, but stick to peer reviewed scientific articles...not the ones from places or people who have something to gain from them).
Hope this helps in some small way, but know it is possible. Again though, just one drink will fire up those latent receptors and you will crash and burn worse very single time...just read all the relapse stories here on SR with cold dread.
Hope you find your own way
Murray