oh goodness. I'll try to answer everything, please forgive me if I skip something.
Helenlee: Thank you for your kind words and encouragement. The things people do to their children makes me want to forget my lady-like tendencies
Redatlanta: My brother has legal primary custody and the "mother" has legal secondary custody with no enforced visitation. They were never married, but brother was placed on the birth certificate. I would talk to the mother, but at this point brother would find out about it and wig out on me. I wouldnt see this child for a long time.