You guys are all awesome. thank you all for your responses.
I think my gift to myself this year will be an e-reader and I shall download the book you suggested, Pelican.
I told XABF about my boundary, he violated it and I'm just enforcing it. I have to keep reminding myself he was well aware of what I said I would do and that he had the choice to drink and create the situation where there's no contact.
And then remind myself that my HP (in my case, the Christian God) I believe has the power to do the spiritual work and God's not asking me to take on the responsibilities for his child that are really his (that's been a tough one as we're sort of taught that we are to be selfless givers till there's nothing left, as Christians). I'm trying to find the verse where we detach with love, (LOL) perhaps it's 1 Cor 5:5...