Originally Posted by
interrupted 
Take the drugs out of the picture. Are lying, deception, manipulation, suspicion, anger, and worry the components of an acceptable relationship for you? Because that's the relationship you are currently in.
Drug addiction is tremendously painful to experience everyday - not just for the addict, they get to numb their pain, but for us, the ones who love them. Now would be a good time to define what it is you want in a relationship, set some boundaries accordingly, and have a plan in place for if those boundaries are violated. Really focus on yourself and how you're feeling, and how you can start to make yourself feel better. It's very easy to lose yourself in the chaos of a loved one's addiction.
I'm sorry that you're going through this, but I'm glad you found us here. You are not alone, keep posting, it helps!
I have to admit that I have already taken a step towards protecting myself. We had been planning to move into his apartment next week. It would have been a great money saver for me, but after I found the bottle of pills last week that he said he was selling, I knew I couldn't move in with him. I signed a lease this week for my own apartment and am moving next week.
I'm honestly very worried about the move because now that we'll be living in separate apartments (he's living with me now, but has kept his apartment) I won't be able to keep a close eye on him. I suppose there's really nothing I can do, though.
The first line of your post is a tough one. I know it's all true, but how do you help someone you love without abandoning them? Do we have to break up and change the relationship into solely a friendship for me to be able to help him?