Redrose,
For me the only thing that made the break easier was time. I handled things very similarly with a complete cutting off of the relationship. No calls, emails, face to face and I struggled and struggled about whether I did the right thing or not. But my life is much better than it would have ever been if I stayed with him. And the only way I know this is by getting distance from him and the relationship. He wasn't going to stop drinking. He loved that more than he loved me and I deserve(d) better than that. It took me time, and many times practicing the phrase, "Because I deserve it" when I would think about the good things in my life.
There was no magic pill for me. No easy way to not see him (or think I saw him) while driving around town. But I love my life now. And I wouldn't have had the energy to devote to myself if I hadn't gotten out. It was the right thing to do. However the right thing doesn't necessarily mean the easy thing.
Be patient with yourself. Time gives distance; and distance gives you perspective; and perspective can bring you great truth.
Go easy on yourself. And practice "Because I deserve it" when you think about your life getting saner and safer and healthier.
Peace,
Petunia