Originally Posted by
Jody675 
yeah it really is easier when someone else makes those choices for us. gives us a moment to breath and build our strength.
but for me, if there is a life line at the end (i.e. we will see them in a few weeks, or that they just need some time to think) then i dont concentrate on me, i concentrate on getting my life better FOR THEM. no matter what i tell everyone else, deep down i am not working on myself, im working on myself so that THEY will see me as better. its like the perfect self lie. everyone THINKS im doing the thing. it LOOKS like im doing the right thing. but REALITY im LYING to myself.just something to think about.
Great insight Jody. I started out the same way. I thought it was my job to get healthy so he would see it and want to get healthy too. I was still trying to control and manipulate the outcome. Fortunately, my thinking changed as soon as I had little breakthroughs and it really did become about me getting healthier.
Lily, I sincerely hope you use this time to work on you. If not, whether its with him or another guy, the patterns will most likely be repeated throughout your life.
God Bless
