Thanks for all the replies, I have made it to the end of day 30 which I'm very proud of. My husband is interacting with me differently, in a positive way, and he knows I go to meetings but that is about it. He never said anything about my drinking before so I guess I shouldn't be surprised that he isn't saying much now.
We really don't talk about important issues either and we haven't for the 20 years that we have been together. Our relationship has sustained a lot of damage that still isn't repaired and on some topics he will NOT discuss anything with me and I've learned to let it be.
My sister (who is also is recovery and sober for a few years now) gave me some good advice which was echoed here, focus on my stuff and I can focus on my marriage later. My sponsor has also stressed building a firm foundation and I'm working on that by starting my steps and getting my feet under me as a sober person.
At some point my husband and I will need to have a heart to heart, but not right now. I know it isn't the right time yet. Thanks for all the encouragement and the replies, I have enjoyed this forum a lot.
Blessings