My ex never really wanted to talk to me about recovery. I ended up talking at him a lot when I first got into recovery, about recovery. He was semi tolerant, but already felt that his life had been invaded by my substance abuse enough. I see his point. Eventually I backed off because I realized that trying to force it was disrespectful to his clear wishes.
It was similar to my young adult children. They didn't really want to have to deal with how messed up mom was, and speaking about recovery would have meant speaking about addiction. They were just glad I wasn't so crazy and messed up anymore.
Our family operated that way, not speaking about certain important issues head on. We would joke about them, dance around them, occasionally poke them with a stick, but never really address them.
In recovery I made the commitment to address my own issues. My family did not commit to that, I was hesitant to stir the pot too much and after a few weak attempts to discuss my addiction and recovery, I stepped back and left it alone.
I feel somewhat removed from my children because there is this hugely important life changing thing in my life that they know nothing about and care nothing about. I am working now on rebuilding relationships with them based on who I am now, and who they are now, because I was out to lunch for a few years while they were transiting into adulthood.