Originally Posted by
Halzuzu 
7 weeks sober and today was the first day that i REALLY wanted to drink..
1st trigger) stressful day of holiday shopping, dealing with rude customer service and other shoppers, traffic, Fedex damaged a package, delivery guy tracked mud on my white carpet, etc
2nd trigger) went into a liquor store for the first time since i stopped drinking just to grab a water. As soon as i walked in my attention immediately went to the rows and rows of liquor behind the counter..it was as if everything was in slo-mo as i walked by. my first instinct was to grab a 1/2 pint..then I snapped out of it, grabbed my water and left.
3rd trigger) friend has called me twice today seemingly taunting me about sobriety.."come on lets go to the bar...what are you gonna do now? Spend your time at the library?....theres a kegger down the street, i'll pick you up". I told him that these type of comments, even if meant lightly, were not welcome. He said okay "BUDDY" and hung up and now I FEEL BAD..like i did something wrong.
Arrrggg!! Happy place happy place happy place.
Needed to vent.
hi Halzuzu,
Just saw your post.....yep, this time of year gets really stressful, and for those of us in recovery, it can really be frightening!!! Triggers one and two, I get that, so I choose the serenity prayer...over and over in my head....through the traffic, past the nasty cs people who seriously have no cs skills...but the third one, your friend.....hmm.
You did NOTHING wrong.....you should be awesomely proud of yourself...I am proud of you!!!! It was really brave of you to be up front with your friend....you need to look after yourself, first.....and you were diplomatic....so it's one of those cases of their stuff not mine, I think...but we're sensitive, and it hurts. So I offer you my love and support....and say well done you!!! xxx