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Old 11-27-2012, 12:01 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
outtolunch
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
I approach this from the aspect of intent.

What is your motivation for the visit? If it's all about sustaining your fantasy that there is something you can say or do to cause him to change, it's likely a waste of both of your time.

If your motivation is to enjoy eachothers company and mutual history and support in spite of his addiction and crimes and your codependency, well then, go for it.

At the end of the day, you have to do what makes you comfortable and sadly for most of us ( including me) this usually means sustaining our own hopeful fantasies that we are powerful enough to compel other people to change. We all have different bottoms before we reach the point where we choose to save ourselves.
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