This is a helpful reminder to me too. I have learned over time to listen, and observe actions, and then decide what is real and what is my own distortion to what I want real to be.
I have learned to watch for red flags...the biggest red flag is when my instinct tells me to proceed with caution.
When my relationships are healthy, at work, with family and friends...then I am comfortable and inspired and feel good. When a relationship is "off", so am I and the discomfort tells me something is wrong that needs taking care of right now, something within "me" that needs changing because I can't change anyone else.
I needed this today, thanks.