Hi sweety, so sorry to hear your going through all of this. Just to let you know that you're not alone. My ex was very similar sounding to yours...though not quite as bad to be honest, but I look back on those 7 years of hell with him whilst I was pregnant and trying to cope with 3 young children and I wonder how on Earth I got through it. If I could go back and speak to myself back then I would tell myself that the best thing I ever did was getting me and my boys away from him. I was so scared that I wouldn't be able to cope on my own, that no one would want me etc etc but I can honestly tell you that life became sooo much easier without him in it. My boys have almost all grown up now and I couldn't be prouder of them or myself for having got out of that nightmare and done it alone. I dread to think how things would have been had I stayed with him. I'm so glad I didn't subject my kids to growing up in that insanity. I'm not saying it's been easy things got far far better when I got rid of him. I look back and wonder what I had done to deserve those 7 years of hell but then look at my boys and realise that they were the best thing that ever happened to me.
Take care of you and your kids darlin and get out of that nightmare!
Big hugs.