so scared
I guess I've told you my story here, never drank met a bloke who drank scotch now I've been drinking it for 16yrs, could never get a babysitter so drinking in became "the thing" needless to say I ditched him 8 yrs ago and changed to wine but the scotch just keeps creeping in. I have a very stressful job no one knows, how the hell I keep hitting my targets is beyond me but I do, but I see it all before me losing everything and bit by bit it's going, i've lost my family, friends, and im so scared im going to lose it all, i was always quite attractive but everytime i quit I get weird lines appear all over my face I think it's dehydration it's very scary none the less i'm at a loss the doctors say there's too much alcohol in my blood but even knowing all this "i've had a bad day" i'll drink "i've had a good day" I'll drink. I am so sick of this cycle it's killing me and everything that I know however I can now manage 3 days off 2 days on so I guess thats better than every night but my bank balance everything I saved is going. Alcohol is rife in my family 2 aunts have died because of it I don't want to fail my son I dont want to lose everything from this disease.