Originally Posted by
Threshold 
Life got to the point where it all seemed hopeless and pointless and too painful. I lost so many things and people I loved and security, and nearly everything by which I identified myself. But still, inside I didn't want to identify myself as a dying alcoholic. I realized that those tag lines are about me. I read and read and read posts here and borrowed the hope of others, and allowed myself to believe that their experiences were true.
I had to internalize them, accept them on a deeper level that I had before, rock myself to sleep with them.
Thank you for sharing this. This was me last night. The only thing that stopped me last night was imagining the alternative: take all the money I have left, buy booze and hotel room and drink and until I died. I imagined my family, friends and, (God help me) daughter when they heard of my disgraceful death. I was too much of a coward to leave them with that.
I prayed a lot last night and while I don't feel good by any means, I am still here and a little more of my fight and resolve returned.
THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR BEING MY LIFELINE. I still find it incredible how a stranger you've never met can save your life on SR.
xo