dude. I feel your pain. But the best thing you can do is practicing focus on yourself and muster up any and all the strength you can to avoid contacting her. make a deal with yourself that you will contact her one year from this moment and stick to it. One of the things fueling her isprobably the fact that she has all that energy of yours, knowing that " she is waiting to hear from you" ( pardon my french but what a bitch)
YOu are just as valuable a human being is as she is..and her sober friend and any other hun=man being on this earth..Focus on getting yorself to a healing place and allow yourself to grieve and mourn..acknowledge the loss to yourself by having some days to wallow but take the other time and use your energy for things that soothe your soul.. i know alot about getting your heart broken by a co dependant relationship.. the best thing you can do for yourself is feel your feelings, heal them, forgive and move the **** on. you will meet someone special who you love as a person and who loves you back as a whole person (often in codependant relationshis we are in love with the companionship not the actual person) in any case..do what you gootta do to heal. YOu are entitled to happiness too!~..dont forget it man!..