Hard
So, I've come to the conclusion that...this is HARD work. Harder than I thought it would be. I feel like any time I'm out of the house, I'm safe. Keep myself busy and I won't drink. But at home, it's a different story. I've drank a few times, only admitted once, to a couple people, because I'm ashamed. It's a huge letdown. You build yourself up, stop drinking for a time, only to slip up. If I didn't know that the "slip-ups" could potentially get me back to where I was, it wouldn't be a big deal. But I know they can. And I don't wanna go back there. I don't want Detox and everything else I've experienced to be in vain. Sobriety felt so good. I just don't get it...well, maybe I do. You become accustomed to doing something, though it's bad for you, but it brings comfort. So even though, deep down, you know you shouldn't, you still want to...but, I'm still questioning myself, why????? I was so sure of myself and now I'm not...