My Alcoholic voice is really trying today!!
As I sit here on this 9th day of November, it's my 29th birthday; and 9 days sober....my longest ever. I should be proud(which I am), but for some reason my mind is acting like all of these (9's) are a coincidence and a reason to celebrate (drink). I have been sitting here reflecting over my past drinking days. Alcoholic/addict for the last 15 years, and starting my first intense outpatient program today. I signed up on my own, no court order.....I really wanna change! My mind is saying "you're facing prison time anyway" why not have 1 drink?". I'm confident that my HP will see me through this mess and the charges will be lowered. I just have to have faith, and continue to pray. Why not drink? Because I CAN'T drink, because it's a losing battle for me everytime, because I almost lost everything in one night from having "1" drink. I have no idea what I am going to do to celebrate today, but one thing I know for sure......I WILL NOT DRINK. Just needed to vent, Thanks for listening!