This is one of those questions that has to do with cleaning up the wreckage of the past. It’s one area where the AA program can be of enormous help. There are multitudes of individuals who have done just this, with the help of a sponsor and the 12 steps. Also, the knowledge and experience that exists in the rooms of AA with regard to this question is enormous. I would enthusiastically recommend that you get involved with AA, find a sponsor and work the steps. Hope you don’t find my advice too blunt or not specific enough regarding your situation, but it’s a complicated issue for most. It also often requires a tailor made plan for different individuals in our past. I think this is by far the best way to deal with the wreckage.