29 hours
i saw that a lot of people viewed the post but didn't reply or leave a comment. that's okay.
Phoenix just woke up from a nap and he had very vivid dreams...
the dreams were of copping of course and the specific dream he had was so real.
it was like in real life; he had let his friend borrow 20 dollars a while back for something and never got the full amount back.
so he decided to call his friend and ask for that money for an "emergency".
as he went to his friend's place which was located right next to his copping spot, he woke up with severe anxiety.
this is the part that Phoenix hates the most.
during getting clean, he always wakes up.. whether it be in the morning or from a nap during the early morning or late night, with that scheming mindset.
it's like a disease that is plaguing over his whole mind.
he hates this feeling, and it leaves him fiending and being super anxious for a few hours.. contemplating if he should scheme and find a way to score.
it's weird cuz Phoenix has made the ultimate decision to quit, but when this happens he is at his weakest point and ultimately gives in to his inner demons.
this time, he will sit it out and write to himself to take his mind off things.
and it seems to be working... ^^ anyone else have these problems?
+29 hours