Of course you want to be loved back dear, and you deserve it, as do all of us here. That's how we think when we're in a relationship - we want to relate and the rest is just trimmings!
But that's not what they think. In the chronic phase of their addiction and new sobriety, all they think of is what can I get or take. They want givers, hostages, providers or victims JUST FOR what the As can take or get from them. They want what THEY want only, which is to feel good themselves regardless of how others feel or to not feel (to be numbed). Anything else is just lies, manipulation and a means to that end.
Please get yourself a lawyer and to Al-Anon. The bank can help you clear the joint account and set you up with a new individual one, but it can't change the title to the houses.