Day 5
Hi. I am home right now and I could not be happier. How on earth did this happen? I was looking forward to getting into my pajamas and not drinking and catching up on my shows and playing some online scrabble. There is so much pressure off me from not drinking. Yes, I can feel sad and I feel it twice as hard but I see all my mistakes and I don't want to re-make them. I will always struggle...especially after having one. When I don't drink, I don't crave it...it is really after having one. But I feel absolutely wonderful and I know I am probably in my honeymoon phase again but I have hope. I really do. Tomorrow is the first saturday in a long time where I have no plans and I'm not drinking during the day. I can't even remember how long ago that has happened to me. A day just for me. And not for me to hide and drink at home but for me to get out there and do things! The pressure of constantly worrying I was going to one beer and wine place too often and switching between them and worrying if I didn't have enough to drink at home was an exhausting way to live. I just hope I have quieted the "bad" girl inside. For a LONG time.
Thanks for listening.