I remember the same feelings. They are but wrenching when I look back and thought that I had this under control. The snappiness I would have in the morning, because I was ashamed of the night before and being jumpy and irrational with my kids because of my own self hate. Thinking to myself, I drank all that? I'm so glad that is all behind me now. I don't miss those shaky mornings or that vicious cycle. I finally understand free living!