Growing up (non-alcoholic home) we were taught, and it seemed to be supported in media, church, etc. that if you messed up, consciously or unconsciously, you fessed up, apologized and fixed it best you could. It was not a "step", it was just what was expected; the "right" thing to do.
It did not mean I kept tallies of who owed me apologies, or that I judged people, or that I was incomplete in some way for lack of them. I usually never even think about apologies or amends, but I am now because of this thread.
We were also taught not to hold grudges and that to note other people's bad manners was in itself bad manners.
I feel that if I completely release the alcoholics in my life from their obligation in the "mess up/ fess up/ apology & or amend" formula, I am exerting my old codie behaviour of me trying to fix their mess and the notion that I am somehow undeserving.
I am not stating this well. Gosh, it is hard to put emotions down in black and white.