My ex has not made amends even though he has been sober for awhile now. I'm not sure if he does AA/Step work or not? Our communication is very limited and that works for us. He was inpatient for a very long time (over a year) and then close follow along so if he were going to I imagine it would have happened already.
I could really care less. It is all in the past for me and if he makes amends or not doesn't matter to me at all. I want him to stay sober for his kids and leave me alone and that is enough.
I can sure see where amends might make the person receiving feel worse, especially if done to soon. I also think it is totally mean and selfish to make an amend and confess to hurtful behavior the other person didn't even know about.