Feeling Sad All Over Again
Ended relationship with XAGF on Thursday.
And have actually being doing much better then I thought I would. The typical waves of sadness, but not the devastation that I thought I would feel.
Been keeping busy and attending a lot of Al Anon meetings.
Many of my AA/Al Anon friends have warned me to be prepared to be strong when she contacts me in the future.
I told them she is not going to contact me. She had previously contacted me the last two times we separated, but this time it is different. She has a new man in her life (just 3 weeks out of rehab.) and plenty of support from all the girls she lives with in sober living.
My fiends told me, believe us she will contact you. This new guy is a temporary distraction. And the fact that you were the one who ended it this time makes a difference. She wanted the new guy and me. The narcism of an alcoholic never ceases to amaze.
Well sure enough she texted me yesterday. I had been receiving her mail while she was in rehab. She wanted to know if I had received an important document. She had already changed the address for this document to her current address. She thought that maybe there was a mix up.
I texted her back that I had not received it. But would let her know if I do.
All very professional.
My friends told me, see this is just the beginning. I told them "no she just needed some information."
They said "could she have gotten this information anywhere else?" I said "yes."
They told me that I am underestimating the neediness and manipulation of the alcoholic.
She knows that text will make you think of her.
Am I being naive that there was more to that text then just needing some info?
Because it did do one thing, it made me start thinking of her and feeling sad all over again.