Withdrawal is one thing. The one you fell in love with is not this person and is away.
Rejection is more. They are away because they chose to leave - reject us as a person, as a partner, as a spouse.
Abandonment is worse. Not only did they choose to leave but they left us with chaos for our children, housing, education, family, finances, employment, and social lives.
Humiliation adds another layer of pain. Not only did they choose to leave us with chaos but they left us hopping in bed with someone at rehab, AA/NA meetings, work, online or all of the above.
The final touch is when they endanger the children with their addictions, addictive behavior and addict lovers or buddies to boot.
And, yes, it's ALL hard.