I wasn't able to see myself with any clarity at all after only two months... It took me a year or two with lots of inventory. I had too much shame early on. When I look back on those early days, I had so much shame that I had ZERO clarity, nada, zelch... No, it wasn't until I had really worked those steps did I begin to have any kind of honest appraisal of who I am.
This "Moment of Clarity" people speak of... I always took that as when one sees where alcohol has taken them, not who or what they are or are not. And... you are not seeking forgiveness later on in your program, you are making amends, making it right... That is much more powerful than saying your sorry.
Go easier on yourself. Do you have a sponsor?